Thursday, August 12, 2010

Top 10 Dumbest Questions

I used to work the front desk in an HR office. And a friend of mine and I had an on going joke called "the dumbest question of the day". If you have ever worked in customer service you understand what I'm talking about.
 I got questions like…
"Where on this application do I put that I was in jail?"
"Is 1pm in the afternoon or the morning?"
"Or how do you spell Prince Street?"
"Why can't I work from 4pm-12pm?"

While I no longer get asked stupid questions by people who schedule themselves to work shifts that go back in time, I do however still get ask stupid questions on a daily basis. One of the worst parts of modeling is getting harassed by men as you go about your castings throughout the day.

Since castings are the model equivalent to job interviews it’s important to be looking your best. Which usually mean clothing that shows your body and heels (without looking like Bubbles from the local strip club of course). Unfortunately this also means a lot of unwanted attention on the streets from creepy men.
So here it is, the top 10 stupid things creepy men ask and say to me on the street…

10. "You're really tall"
I'm starting to think that my day would not be complete without hearing that.
Seriously, I had noooo idea! Thank you for informing me.

9. "You're so skinny girl! What do you eat?"
McDonalds and dairy queen. What do you think...

8. "How do you stay so skinny?"
I hate when strangers ask me this.
They ask me as if I have some magical answer like I wear ruby slippers and click my heels together 3 times while saying "There's no weight like 115".
 I eat salad and go to the gym.

7. "Are you a Model?"
Now before you go "Alyssa, you're so mean! There are legit questions!" we need to look at who's asking. While there are some people who are actually just curious and interested, the majority is creepy men trying to start a conversation.

6. "How do you walk in those heels?"I know, I know. This is another legitimate question. And again I have no problem when people ask out of sincere curiosity. But, yet again, it’s another brilliant question men use as a pick up line. In which case my response is "one foot in front of the other"

5. "How did you get to be so tall and skinny?"
I grew that way. Idiot.

4. One man told me I have “Twin Tower legs”
Is that a compliment?!

3. Creepy men LOVE to say hello.
Usually I ignore them and pretend I didn't hear them. Normally they leave me alone when I don't respond. But one man proceeded to insult my "big" feet. What a sore loser. A pretty girl doesn't say Hi back and he has to insult my feet. Too bad he was out of ear shot by the time I thought to tell him that I may have big feet but they're still 16 times bigger than his penis. And last time I checked a size 10 shoe is pretty average for 5'11.

2. So I'm walking down the street with my friend, minding my own business, having a normal conversation. And this man walking by goes "I want this one!" And grabs my arm. I guess to ensure we all knew who "this one" meant?
Okay, 1st off. Do not touch me. I don't know what you expect to get out of that except for a kick in the balls. 2nd, I'm a human being not a "this one".
And 3rd, your pimp game = FAIL!

1. "Bend over"
Whatever happened to the days when men courted women?!

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